So I recently bought a Living Social deal to The Melting Pot, this divine local fondue place where you get salad, bread, a main cheesy fondue course, and then a dessert course (complete with many fruits and cakes to dip in rich molten milk chocolate). (And ooh, with the deal I bought, we get champagne too!)
I've been there twice before.
However, I still have tremendous reservations and massive trepidation.
Here's the deal. You are presented with a platter of totally and completely raw food. This includes veggies, but also raw beef, raw shrimp, and God Jesus Himself help us, raw chicken. Raw. Just right there on the fucking plate, raw dead animals of every kind.
Then you skewer your desired son of a bitch and roast it in broiling oil until your Jesus or your conscience says it's done, at which point you dip your seared flesh into a common pot of cheesy deliciousness and then consume. Hoping all the while that your meat was, indeed, cooked, and that you haven't just contaminated the pot of cheese that you will next dip your bread into.
If that's not a recipe for disaster, I don't know what is.
I mean, how long do you boil chicken in hot savory oil? How long do you boil shrimp? The two are drastically different, and if you make a mistake, woe to your digestive tract. When is a slice of zucchini at its done-point, and when is raw cow seared enough to be safe enough to consume?
Plus, there's the fact that when you go there with friends, you are all eating off your skewers and then dipping them right back into the pot of cheese. I mean, I presume that laying your skewer in boiling oil kills off a herpe or two, but still, the skeeve-factor is there. Slurping food off a stick and then sticking your stick back into the common pot.
Not to mention, the bum-bum germs and raw meat germs that must be present at all times on every single surface around you, since people manhandle raw shit and don't give a damn. All blacklight-hotel-like:
I kind of can't believe I've ever been there. Not to mention twice. Not to mention I just bought a gift certificate for a third visit.
Except that it's fucking delicious.