Fun Friendly Phobic Fact Friday.

"Science Is Fun and Useful"

by Jo

This is one of the most kickass videos I've ever seen. (1) Because this guy is awesome; (2) because the wisdom he imparts is true and important re: the viruses with the highest-known fatality rates; and (3) because this guy is awesome.

So let's do watch.

(Totally can't get it to embed AARRRRGGGHH)

Let's just start with his opening line, "There's a lot of stuff out there that's trying to kill us, right now, and today, I'm gonna talk about the ones that are the best at it. The Five Deadliest Infectious Diseases in the World."

The 10 minute 23 second video is worth your while; however, if you're all tl;dr? and you don't feel like watching the entire thing? Then let me just summarize, BumBumStyle:

• The Spanish Flu (1917-1918) was a notorious infectious disease, also known as...wait for it...H1N1. It killed more than 30 million people worldwide. ( Now you may recall that in 2009 there was also mass hysteria over a resurgence of the pandemic H1N1, a.k.a. Swine Flu to the point that you could not find face masks or hand sani in any drugstore anywhere.) Anyway, the first outbreak had a case fatality rate of 20%, and apparently, 20% (!!) is so minor in the grand scheme of things that it's not even worth talking about. Bygones. Let's move on, shall we?

• Let's take Nipah, which has an average case fatality rate of about 50% (other online sources claim up to 75%). It seems that around 1999, pig farmers started coming down with respiratory issues, and inflammation of the brain that caused hallucinations, along with seizures (and should you wonder, no, "not the good kind of seizures," according to SciShow). What.

Outbreaks continued in India and Bangladesh, the disease mainly spread by bats, at which point and in which place the death rate became around 100 mother fucking percent. Are you hearing me. 100%. 

And what's worse, you suddenly didn't need a got-damn bat or pig or a batpig or a pigbat to give you Nipah, you get could get it human-to-human. And then you'd fucking die. Dead. Deceased. Of a miserable death.

Pigbat!!

In 2001, in Siliguri, India, there were cases of Nipah where 75% of cases were traced back to people who had merely visited the local hospital. Just by being there. In that building. Just by, say, strolling in to give a loved one some pink carnations and a "Get Well Soon" Mylar balloon. Maybe a Peace Lily or two.

"Get well soon! I hope you recover from your Nipah! As if!"

Perhaps best of all, according to the WHO, there is no treatment or vaccine available for either humans or animals. Which might explain why up to 100% of the people infected die dead.

So that is of little interest to you. After all, you do not live in Siliguri, India. So let's talk about H5N1 (commonly known as Bird Flu). 

• H5N1 didn't used to be easily transmissible to humans, but then scientists went and got all 10-year-old-boy on us and asked, "What would happen if I did this? Let's see if I can do this!! Let me dick around with something! What would happen if I did that? Let's fukkin' blow shit up, man!111@@!"

Apparently, this tinkering made flu transmissible to ferrets, which have (for some reason) the same immune system as humans. Which sucks because this newly and easily transmissible Bird Flu kills at least 54% of people who get it. For fuck's SAKE, ferrets?? Good times. 

There is a government vaccine available for H5N1, but it has apparently been stockpiled and is not available to the public. Good times.

---

And I quote: "Now Hank, you're saying I'm not a Malaysian bat-handler and I've already stocked my pantry with enough Skittles and Diet Sierra Mist to get me through the Bird Flu pandemic."

So in other words, I'm golden, right? Read on, friends, read on.

• In 1967, Germany started testing polio vaccines on monkeys from Uganda. Suddenly the scientists came down with wicked fevers, vomiting, diarrhea, massive internal bleeding, and circulatory failure. Good times.

Corellation: Messing with monkey parts = contracting killer diseases. Quit poking around monkey parts, you zoophile.

After further investifuckingation, they eventually isolated the virus known as Marburg Hemorrhagic Fever.

In one year alone, 23% of the scientists exposed died. It shows up everywhere from Africa to the United States, where it kills more than 80%. EIGHTY. PER. CENT. Scientists say that Marburg Hemmorhagic Fever is "the #1 virus you most want to mother fucking got damn avoid," if I may paraphrase. Let's try to do that, people. Start by washing your damn dirty hands and then not messing with monkey parts. But I mean, there is more than one good reason never to mess with monkey parts. For one, that's a hell of a lot of bum-bum germs.

So even if you live in the USA, never handle bats, and have thousands of Snickers and gallons of Orange Crush available in your storm shelter, you are not safe from terrifying diseases.

• A cousin of Marburg Fever is the Zaire Ebola virus (a.k.a. ZEBOV). It is the second most deadly disease in the world and causes everything from vomiting to fever to failure of blood vessels, which causes bleeding under the skin (groce).  ZEBOV has a mortality rate of 83%, and in the early 2000s, it killed more than 90% of the people infected. That's a shit of a lot, people.

• As a sidenote, what do these all viruses (virii?) have in common?

All of these viruses are Zoonotic ("transmitted to humans from animals"). Especially from bats. Fuck you, bats. I hate you in the face.

For these and other reasons, let's just avoid adopting your local neighborhood Battus Vampirus, even though it may be precious and have a cute little snout and you want to name it Edward.

Back to our regularly scheduled program about shit what will kill you.

So, after reading about ZEBOV, you're probably wondering, what disease is deadlier than 90% fatal?? This may surprise you, my peeps.

The deadliest disease in the world is not influenza, is not typhoid, is not dysentery,

...but is rabies, with case fatality rate of, oh, you know, whatever, about 100%. Bygones.

What? Like, Spiffy my sweet little Labradoodle can kill my ass? Or rather, what: like, sweet little Cujo can go from this

to this

and I won't have a chance in heaven once symptoms present?

You're saying that man's best friend can harbor the greatest plague known to humanity? Even though there's a vaccine and shit?

Yes, there is a vaccine, but once you've been diagnosed with the symptoms of the disease, you face almost certain death. There is a case fatality rate of p. much 100%.

According to Science Guy, there have been fewer than 10 recorded cases EVER IN THE HISTORY EVER OF THE ENTIRE WORLD EVER of people who have EVER been diagnosed with rabies and who have EVER lived to tell about it. Ever.

Apparently it's a terrible way to go: Early flu-like symptoms, then it targets your central nervous system, and you become agitated, delirious, and have seizures. Then you will experience paralysis, especially of the throat and jaw, making it difficult to swallow liquids (which is why patients avoid water and which is why rabies is known as hydrophobia). Ma! He's got The Hydrophobe!!

Old Yeller,

Come back Yeller,

Best doggone dog in the West.

With rabies, your pulse and blood pressure will vary wildly, and along with other v. unpleasant symptoms like acute pain and mania, then you will experience coma and heart failure respiratory failure and death. 100% of the time.

And although bats have caused all kinds of other really, really bad shit (see above), they usually get a bad rap when it comes to rabies.  Everyone is all, "OMG OMG IT'S A BAT it's going to get stuck in my hair and bite me and I will get the rabies! OMG BATS!" But actually, about 97% of cases in humans come from dog bites. Out, out damn Spot!

---

This ends your science lesson for the day and your very extensive Fun Friendly Phobic Fact Friday.

Love,
Jo

Fun Phobic Fact Friday!

Let's take a break from my usual moroseness lately and get back into the groove of FUN PHOBIC FACT FRIDAY!!

Since I've missed so many lately, here are about a billion to tide you over:


1. Ever have a craving for a peanut butter sandwich? That thick, yummy, and creamy goodness. In one pound of peanut butter, it typically can contain up to 150 bug fragments and 5 rodent hairs. [Ed. Note: Who's in charge of making this peanut butter? Remy the Rat(atouille)?]

2. House flies go to the bathroom roughly every 4.5 minutes. Think about that next time you see one fly on your delicious dinner. [Ed. Note: Am I the only one totally amused by the term "go to the bathroom"? It's like saying "House flies use the lavatory roughly every 4.5 minutes."]

3. Step outside and smell the roses. On a daily average you will inhale 1 liter of others anal gasses. [Ed. Note: "Anal gasses," as it were, also contain small particles of actual fecal material. Which makes this Fun Fact even more disgusting.]

4. In the mood for fast food? An average person will consume 12 pubic hairs in their fast food annually. Gross! [Ed. Note: "I'll have the McPube and a large snot fry, please, and one vanilla-spooge milkshake." "Thank you, drive through."]

5. It's summer time, and that means the pools are open! If you swim one hour in a public pool you will intake 1/12 liters of urine. [Ed. Note: Who is drinking liters of pool water? Pools are to swim in, not quench your thirst with.]

And just because it's precious:

6. Creepy crawling cockroaches. As if they aren't disgusting looking enough. These insects carry over 40 different pathogens which risk being transferred to humans. Included is pneumonia, plague, hepatitis, and typhoid fever just to name a few. [Ed. Note: Praise the small baby Jesus that I have never in my life encountered a real life cucaracha. I am so skeeved by them that I can't even look at the cockroach exhibit in the nocturnal house at the zoo. Thank God I do not live where cockroaches are prevalent. I won't name names, but, 

7. Need to use the bathroom? When a person pees, a small deposit of urine enters the mouth through the saliva glands. [Ed. Note: WUT. Just, WUT. I'd like to see the scientifical science on this plz.]

[I tried to find an image to fit this Fun Fact, but YOU just try to google "pee in mouth" and see what happens. I think I'll skip adding a photo this time.]

8. Need that morning jump? Next time you go out to the coffee shop think about this, diarrhea induced E.Coli was found on 10% of coffee mugs in the U.S. [Ed. Note: In addition to E.Coli hands handling your coffee mugs, have you ever seen lipstick on a glass of water you order? Think how much herpes that might contain.]

9. Enjoy a nice cup of yogurt? You might want to double check the ingredients again. Some yogurts and jelly sweets contain beef or pork gelatin. [Ed. Note: "Now introducing new Yoplait Pig Hoof flavor, with 25% less fat than original Yoplait Beef Toenail Delite!"]

10. Think you've got it bad when you vomit? The longest recorded projectile vomiting is 27 feet. I wonder what he ate. [Ed. Note: I just have one word for you: MY CAT OPIE'S PUKE. Remember this gem? I think Opie gave this man a run for his money.]

11. We all like a man who gives a nice firm hand shake. However, you might want to think twice before returning the firm grip. Annually you will shake hands with 6 men who have recently masturbated and did not wash their hands. [Ed. Note: Men are fucking gross. The end.]

12. Through contact with door knobs, counter tops, and other daily objects your hand will come in contact with 15 penises a day. [Ed. Note: I'd be willing to bet that it was more like 9,000 penises.]

13. When we sleep we are the most relaxed and at peace. Who would've thought that while you are snoozing you were inhaling bugs! In a years time, most humans will consume 14 insects while in their sleep. [Ed: Note: Inhaling or ingesting? Let's be accurate here, people. Because I do not want 14 insects living in my alveoli.]

14. Having work done to your house? Research has shown that in a lifetime you will have had 22 workmen examine the dirty contents of your linen basket. [Ed. Note: When posting a Craigslist ad for a handyman, please make sure to specify "No panty sniffers need apply."]

15. Here comes the bride. Next time you're planning to attend a wedding reception you might want to bring a handkerchief. You have a 1/100 chance of taking home a cold sore from one of the guests. Cold sores are a form of oral herpes! [Ed. Note: How? Are you attending weddings and going around kissing 100 people on they moufs?]

There you have it. Fifteen Fun Phobic Facts for this Friday.

Fun Friendly Phobic Fact Friday! Shitpaws Edition.

Do you ever think how germy the toilet paper holder is?

A lot of the time, the toilet paper roll gets changed while you are actually in the process of doing your dirty bidness. That is, you have a duke, use some toilet paper, run out of toilet paper, reach for new toilet paper, then put it on the toilet paper holder. With grody grody germy hands.

Then sometimes, while strolling casually through the ancestral manse, maybe you notice that the roll is empty, so while doing other chores or just brushing your teeth, you take a minute to put a new toilet paper roll on. And you touch the grody grody germy toilet paper holder that someone else touched with shitpaws.

For the love of God Almighty, people, please wash your hands after touching the toilet paper holder for ANY reason.

Love,
Jo

Fun Friendly Phobic Fact Friday! or, You Have Died of Dysentery.

Lake swimming. 

We've all done it as kids. I used to love nothing more than to ease, eeeease myself into the frigid waters of Lake Retreat when we went there for family camp. I used to swim, cannonball, and dive gleefully into those waters, yea though the surface was positively replete with duck shit. And in the outer areas, there were lily pads so dense that it's a wonder I never drowned. (I did get badly caught in them one time, and my wee short life flashed before mine eyes.)

I don't remember always showering after a visit to the lake. Sometimes I did, but surely, sometimes I did not. I do remember showering after an ill-fated, attempted canoe ride, in which I asked a morose, lonely, v. large girl to come boating with me, and I got in first, then she tried to, but she tipped us over. I in my favorite sweater and jeans and shoes was not pleased. Plus, I was 13, and it was very important to look good, so back to the cabin I went and showered that shit off me and washed my hair a dozen times.

But I digress.

Even though we all technically survived lake-swimming, is it safe?

Not always.

First of all, there are beasts. You may encounter snakes (including venomous ones), snapping turtles, alligators, leeches, Asian carp, etc. Or pissed-off geese.

Second, you may contract nasty bugs, such as pathogenic bacteria, viruses, and parasites. Picking up a case of Giardiasis is a not-uncommon threat. You contract it by swallowing even small amounts of tainted lakewater. Also frequently present are Shigella, Campylobacter jejuni, Leptospirosis, Helicobacter pylori, Legionella, Mycobacterium avium complex, Salmonella, and Typhoid fever (yes, Typhoid fever--not just what you die of in Oregon Trail).

Amoebas are another concern: 

Lakes and rivers are a popular place for those hoping for relief from the summertime heat. However, water-borne bacteria called amoeba could ruin your plans. It's a tiny parasite that breeds in water. It enters through the nose and attacks the brain. Symptoms are flu-like and can come on rapidly, and, if it enters your body, attacks the brain.

Lakes also often contain fecal coliform and Chromobacterium Violaceum, which has made people severely sick:

HOPE MILLS (WTVD) -- Doctors at UNC Hospitals are fighting to stop an infection caused by a common bacteria found in lakes before it spreads through the body of a 14-year-old Cumberland County boy. 

Matthew McKinney was taken to UNC Children's Hospital to be treated for the bacterial infection that he picked up while swimming in Hope Mills Lake on June 14. 

"It's not every day a doctor says, 'your son's dying, we're going to try to save his life,'" Matthew's father, Brian McKinney, said in an interview with Eyewitness News Wednesday. 

McKinney said doctors had to remove part of his son's nose, half of the palette in his mouth and five teeth.

"I just can't imagine. It's like something in the movies. It's a nightmare," he said. "I just can't imagine not having a roof to your mouth and bless his heart, he doesn't know this is happening." 

The teen is still in critical condition, but his father said he is doing a little bit better. Tests have showed the bacteria may be making its way out of his bloodstream. However, he's not yet out in the clear. 

The bacteria called Chromobacterium Violaceum that Matthew contracted is common in the sand and mud at the bottom of lakes, ponds and rivers across the state.  

"It's everywhere. It's natural. It's in the environment," McKinney said.  

McKinney said his son and his friends were diving under water, rooting up rocks lodged in the lake floor where the bacteria lives. 

"The biggest thing the doctor said was don't go digging in the mud," McKinney said.
Health officials have not closed Hope Mills Lake - nor issued a health warning - but they are advising swimmers not to drink the water. They also say it's a good idea to use soap and shower off after swimming, immediately clean and treat any cut or wound, and seek a doctor's care if a cut or scratch gets infected.

YIKE.

And for the love of God, please avoid these three areas:

Lake Karachay, Russia

According to a report by the Worldwatch Institute on nuclear waste, Karachay is the most polluted spot on Earth. It was used by the Soviet Union as a nuclear dumping site, and now the radiation level here is so high that it's sufficient to give a lethal dose after just an hour of exposure. 

Onondaga Lake, NY

Onondaga Lake is arguably the most polluted lake in the United States. No other lake in the United States receives as much of its inflow as wastewater. It is also severely polluted with various forms of nitrogen. Concentrations of total ammonia and nitrate in the upper productive layers (near the lake's surface) remain well above levels considered limiting to plant growth (phosphorus is the limiting nutrient). Concentrations of total ammonia and nitrite exceed standards, often by a wide margin, intended to protect aquatic life against the toxic effects of these forms of nitrogen.

The Berkeley Pit, MT

New fungal and bacterial species call this deadly lake home. The pit is one mile long by half a mile wide, and over 1780 feet deep, 1000 of which are filled with acidic water with high concentrations of heavy metals and toxic chemicals, including copper, iron, arsenic, cadmium, zinc, and sulfuric acid. The iron-rich water near the surface is reddish, yielding to a vibrant lime-green hue not far below the surface, where copper concentrations are higher. If you were to drink large amounts of this lovely concoction it would kill you by corroding through your digestive system.

And please, please, if you must swim in a bum-bum-germ-infested lake? Godsakes man, please shower afterward. 

Fun Friendly Phobic Fact Friday!

/end trans

Fun Friendly Phobic Fact Friday!

Is it just me, or has EVERYBODY come down with a stomach bug this winter? That's all I hear about on Facebook. "So-and-so is barfing all over. Oh wait, now so is his brother. Shit, the husband has it now! ERRRBODY'S PUKING!!" My Facebook newsfeed is awash in vomit and diarrhea. Every day. (Seriously, do you feel the need to inform your long-lost classmates and your Auntie May that you are experiencing ass-pee? WTF.)

Then I read this. Found this gem courtesy of my BFF Mandi:

Researchers have discovered that closing the toilet lid before you flush could prevent the norovirus, also known as the winter vomiting bug, from spreading. 

Scientists from the Leeds Teaching Hospitals NHS Trust found that leaving the lavatory lid up when you flush the toilet causes a cloud of bacteria to explode into the air and settle on nearby surfaces. 

This increases the risk of viruses such as the winter vomiting bug and hospital superbugs transmitting from one person to another. 

The researchers tested a range of hospital toilets to see whether leaving the toilet seat up or down has any impact on the stomach bug spreading. 

They used a sterilised toilet and created a 'diarrhoea effect' in it using stool samples deliberately infected with the superbug C. difficile. 

Researchers found when the toilet lid was left open, the superbug was transported 10 inches above and on the toilet seat, plus a smaller amount was detected in the air up to 90 minutes later.
When the lid was put down while flushing, the bug could reach through the gap of the lid but there was a significantly lower level of it in the air. There was also no C. difficile recovered on nearby surfaces. 

Ironically, most hospital toilets do not have toilet lids in a bid to stop cross-contamination when handling the seat. The study is urging hospitals to provide patients with the superbug with a toilet that has a lid. 

"This contains smells and droplets that can become aerolised. Some bugs spread more easily to surfaces this way and the norovirus is thought to be one of them. Our advice - put down the lid if it's there and wash your hands afterwards," professor Mark Wilcox, Clinical Director of Microbiology, told the Daily Mail. 

The norovirus has hit the headlines on numerous occasions this winter, with there being 46 suspected cases in under 2 weeks, causing double the amount of hospital bed closures and followed by scientists' claims that they may have found a cure. 

If you're worried about catching the norovirus. although there is no treatment for the illness the NHS recommends taking the following precautions to help prevent the norovirus spreading:

WASH YOUR HANDS.

Wash your hands frequently and thoroughly with soap and water, particularly after using the toilet and before preparing food.

DON'T SHARE TOWELS.

Avoid sharing flannels and towels with anyone who has had or has the superbug, or anyone who may be exposed to it in any way. 

DISINFECT SURFACES.

Disinfect any surfaces or objects that could be contaminated with the virus. Wash the items separately and on a hot wash to ensure that the virus is killed.

KEEP YOUR TOILET CLEAN.

Keep the toilet and surrounding area clean and disinfected to avoid any cross-contamination.

AVOID RAW, UNWASHED FOOD.

Avoid eating raw, unwashed produce and only eat oyster from a reliable source. Note that oysters are known to carry the virus.

Fun Friendly Phobic Fact Friday!

You know those makeup testers they have at Nordstrom, Macy's, Sephora, everywhere you go?

Yeah.

You might want to rethink using those little testers to see how a little NARS Shanghai Express looks on your lips or how some Bare Escentuals Pure Radiance looks on your cheeks. Or God forbid how a little Maybelline Great Lash looks on your eyes.

" 'We went to department stores, specialty stores, drugstores — everywhere,' she says. Her researchers found staph, strep and even E. coli bacteria on makeup testers. 'Wherever you see E. coli, you should just think "E. coli equals feces," ' Brooks says. 'That means someone went to the bathroom, didn't wash their hands and then stuck their fingers in that moisturizer.' Brooks says that when they tested the makeup on Saturdays — the day with the most traffic at cosmetic counters — the percentage of tainted makeup was 100%."

So if you want the Herp or a raging case of pinkeye, go ahead. Else, let's put down those tiny brushes and wee dipsticks and step away from the makeup counter, shall we?

Fun Friendly Phobic Fact Friday!

The Five-Second Rule Revisited.

A study in the April 2007 Journal of Applied Microbiology found that salmonella could survive up to 28 days on a dry surface and be transferred “almost immediately on contact.”

Throw that shit away when you drop it! Or else don't get salmonella and other nasties on your floors. Whichever.

Fun Friendly Phobic Fact Friday!

Please, for the love of God, close the toilet seat before you flush it. When you flush, microparticles of toilet water (and whatever was in the toilet) are aerosolized and are sprayed up to several feet away, landing on you countertops, your hair brush, your cup of water, and your...*dry heaves* your toothbrush. So keep these items as far from the toilet as you can, and always, always close the lid before flushing.

PS: Don't forget to ask me questions in our Q & A session!!