Fair Enough.

So last weekend was actually a delightful one. I somehow had enough energy and motivation, and slightly less anxiety, about getting out of the house and actually doing shit.

The first thing we did on Saturday was go to the local town center to have lunch with my husband's mom and grandma. I ordered ceviche, which of course is raw fish, so that in itself was "brave" of me to take that risk, since I'm usually so food-phobic, especially in restaurants. I mean, OMG WHAT IF I GOT A PARASITE? ...Well, come to think of it, a nice roundworm or tapeworm or two could help me shed some of this unwanted weight....

Bygones.

Anyway, my other major accomplishment was that I let the baby eat tortilla chips...straight off the restaurant table. Now, if you'll please recall, this is what I've previously wiped up when I use Lysol wipes on restaurant tables:

Totes groce right?

I admit I did give a cursory swipe of the table with Sani-Hands...

 ...but didn't do my usual crazed wipedown deep cleaning like a white demon on crack. The baby also touched things like, OMG, the highchair, and crayons, and other things, and I still let her eat chips with her hands. This is a major accomplishment!

Afterward, we all wandered the toy store, and I actually let my kids touch stuff. I know, right?

Doesn't mean I didn't use large quantities of hand sani the second we got back in the car to go home, but still. Baby steps. Baby steps.

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Sunday was by far the most fun day. The fam and I went to a local Farmers Market. They had everything you could ever want, from fresh peaches and blackberries and raspberries and corn and cucumbers and plums, to pastries and headbands and fairy wings and knit blankets and and glass sculptures and jewel earrings and just basically every beautiful or crafty thing under the sun. I went a little crazy and ended by buying a lot of things. Here's some of my loot:

This one shows the fuckamaze flowers I bought for a mere US$10, plus fresh-picked raspberries, these divine tiny plums that look and taste a bit like cherries, some pickled garlic (omg my husband will move out if I eat these), spices to make chip-dips with (lime-cilantro, garlic-habanero, and garlic & chive), some honey sticks for Maya, and this gorgeous glass bottle painted with ladybugs, perfect for Naomi's ladybug-themed room. I plan to put some lovely red flowers in it instead of using it for, say, olive oil or something.

The next pic shows a few of the things I forgot to add the first time, namely, a beautiful ladybug bracelet made especially for my little ladybug Naomi, and some beer-bread mix.

And at last, one more picture of my flowers, because they are the most delightful thing I've seen in a long time:

They make me so happy as I sit here typing, even right now:

The market was right on the naval station pier, so we had a gorgeous view of the Puget Sound and of the boats and such. It was such a beautiful day. I had a really wonderful time. Oh, and my major accomplishments for the day? I let Maya snack on a few fresh berries straight from the baskets, with her bare dirty hands and without washing the berries first and knowing full well that God knows who had pawed through them first. YAY ME!

Just kidding.

No, I mean, she did eat the berries, but cured? lol forever.

Anyway, it was a beautiful day.

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On Monday, since my husband Code Red had the day off, we went to the Monroe Fair. I had actually been dreading it, since fairs are filthy business rife with smells of fried onions, filthy carnies, and vomit. I also knew we'd have to let Maya go on some rides, like the carousel, and she'd have to, yes, once again, touch things. Like, I know you don't get how hard this is for me, to merely let my kids touch things, but trust me, it's hard.

But we had a good time. It was another sunny day, and we wandered all about the grandstands, looked at all the cows and baby cows and pigs and baby pigs and goats and baby goats and other such adorableness. I even went on a ride or two, namely, the Super Shot, which brings you up approx 923749038523 feet in the air and then drops you in a dead freefall.

Here I am getting ready to go, stomach in delicious knots:

Here I am on my way up:

And here I am after my death-defying drop:

I am hardcore, yo. Even did it with a walking cast on.

It was a blast.

I also bought a few wonderful things, like a beautiful ring for on the cheap, and an even more beautiful bracelet (for $5!! She could have sold those things for $20 at least!). I also bought some carved wooden frames with the girls' names in them, which I will put photos in and hang on the wall. Oh, oh!! And three air plants! (The pics on that link do not do them justice.) I love them, they are so beautiful and sweet. I plan to put them in gorgeous tiny vases filled with glass beads. I hope I do not kill them, as I have a habit of killing even succulents, which are basically unkillable.

Oh and I let the baby have a taste of fair food. Fair food is notorious for being, let's just say, unsanitary. But I did it. I did it.

Here are a few (thousand) photos from our adventure:

These goats were snuzzling and loving on each other.

Precious dada and Maya.

Naomi remained unimpressed by the entire experience.

Gorgeous Maya and less-gorgeous JoJo who could benefit from a tapeworm or two from ceviche.

Fairs are so exciting you have to RUN!!

Maya is astounded by the tiny, tiny piglets born 17 days ago.

Is this considered a pornographic photo? BEWBS

Naomi's first ride ever! At first she was nonplussed by the experience, then had a blast.

Here I have to show you her intense concentration on getting this pony thing just right.

My gorgeous darling and a wee goat behind her.

And last but not least, the ickiest part of the day, seeing one of those stands that sells "lotion bars." (They look just like bars of soap but they're made of waxy lotion and you rub them about your hands to moisturize them.) They offer free sample bars for you to try, and I cannot begin to fathom the amount of filthy paws that had previously manhandled those lotion bars. Creeped me out so hard.

And on top of this very pleasant weekend, I've actually felt a bit...dare I say? Happy? Who knows, because my moods change on a dime, but I've felt a lot more content the last 24 hours or so. Maybe it's my new med, which, to treat symptoms, and I quote, is "unknown how it works at this time." Good times. But hey, if it works, it works, even if I'm taking something that might make me grow a third arm.

This weekend gave me hope. but being the Debbie Downer pessimist that I am, I can only wait for the other shoe to drop.

Oh well. I had me a v. nice weekend. And I hope you all did too. :)

Fun Friendly Phobic Fact Friday! or, You Have Died of Dysentery.

Lake swimming. 

We've all done it as kids. I used to love nothing more than to ease, eeeease myself into the frigid waters of Lake Retreat when we went there for family camp. I used to swim, cannonball, and dive gleefully into those waters, yea though the surface was positively replete with duck shit. And in the outer areas, there were lily pads so dense that it's a wonder I never drowned. (I did get badly caught in them one time, and my wee short life flashed before mine eyes.)

I don't remember always showering after a visit to the lake. Sometimes I did, but surely, sometimes I did not. I do remember showering after an ill-fated, attempted canoe ride, in which I asked a morose, lonely, v. large girl to come boating with me, and I got in first, then she tried to, but she tipped us over. I in my favorite sweater and jeans and shoes was not pleased. Plus, I was 13, and it was very important to look good, so back to the cabin I went and showered that shit off me and washed my hair a dozen times.

But I digress.

Even though we all technically survived lake-swimming, is it safe?

Not always.

First of all, there are beasts. You may encounter snakes (including venomous ones), snapping turtles, alligators, leeches, Asian carp, etc. Or pissed-off geese.

Second, you may contract nasty bugs, such as pathogenic bacteria, viruses, and parasites. Picking up a case of Giardiasis is a not-uncommon threat. You contract it by swallowing even small amounts of tainted lakewater. Also frequently present are Shigella, Campylobacter jejuni, Leptospirosis, Helicobacter pylori, Legionella, Mycobacterium avium complex, Salmonella, and Typhoid fever (yes, Typhoid fever--not just what you die of in Oregon Trail).

Amoebas are another concern: 

Lakes and rivers are a popular place for those hoping for relief from the summertime heat. However, water-borne bacteria called amoeba could ruin your plans. It's a tiny parasite that breeds in water. It enters through the nose and attacks the brain. Symptoms are flu-like and can come on rapidly, and, if it enters your body, attacks the brain.

Lakes also often contain fecal coliform and Chromobacterium Violaceum, which has made people severely sick:

HOPE MILLS (WTVD) -- Doctors at UNC Hospitals are fighting to stop an infection caused by a common bacteria found in lakes before it spreads through the body of a 14-year-old Cumberland County boy. 

Matthew McKinney was taken to UNC Children's Hospital to be treated for the bacterial infection that he picked up while swimming in Hope Mills Lake on June 14. 

"It's not every day a doctor says, 'your son's dying, we're going to try to save his life,'" Matthew's father, Brian McKinney, said in an interview with Eyewitness News Wednesday. 

McKinney said doctors had to remove part of his son's nose, half of the palette in his mouth and five teeth.

"I just can't imagine. It's like something in the movies. It's a nightmare," he said. "I just can't imagine not having a roof to your mouth and bless his heart, he doesn't know this is happening." 

The teen is still in critical condition, but his father said he is doing a little bit better. Tests have showed the bacteria may be making its way out of his bloodstream. However, he's not yet out in the clear. 

The bacteria called Chromobacterium Violaceum that Matthew contracted is common in the sand and mud at the bottom of lakes, ponds and rivers across the state.  

"It's everywhere. It's natural. It's in the environment," McKinney said.  

McKinney said his son and his friends were diving under water, rooting up rocks lodged in the lake floor where the bacteria lives. 

"The biggest thing the doctor said was don't go digging in the mud," McKinney said.
Health officials have not closed Hope Mills Lake - nor issued a health warning - but they are advising swimmers not to drink the water. They also say it's a good idea to use soap and shower off after swimming, immediately clean and treat any cut or wound, and seek a doctor's care if a cut or scratch gets infected.

YIKE.

And for the love of God, please avoid these three areas:

Lake Karachay, Russia

According to a report by the Worldwatch Institute on nuclear waste, Karachay is the most polluted spot on Earth. It was used by the Soviet Union as a nuclear dumping site, and now the radiation level here is so high that it's sufficient to give a lethal dose after just an hour of exposure. 

Onondaga Lake, NY

Onondaga Lake is arguably the most polluted lake in the United States. No other lake in the United States receives as much of its inflow as wastewater. It is also severely polluted with various forms of nitrogen. Concentrations of total ammonia and nitrate in the upper productive layers (near the lake's surface) remain well above levels considered limiting to plant growth (phosphorus is the limiting nutrient). Concentrations of total ammonia and nitrite exceed standards, often by a wide margin, intended to protect aquatic life against the toxic effects of these forms of nitrogen.

The Berkeley Pit, MT

New fungal and bacterial species call this deadly lake home. The pit is one mile long by half a mile wide, and over 1780 feet deep, 1000 of which are filled with acidic water with high concentrations of heavy metals and toxic chemicals, including copper, iron, arsenic, cadmium, zinc, and sulfuric acid. The iron-rich water near the surface is reddish, yielding to a vibrant lime-green hue not far below the surface, where copper concentrations are higher. If you were to drink large amounts of this lovely concoction it would kill you by corroding through your digestive system.

And please, please, if you must swim in a bum-bum-germ-infested lake? Godsakes man, please shower afterward.